Now I hate them too

Day Off #2, and I had plans to paint the porch trim, but a few errands cropped up first.

After the pup and I took a ride to pick up my bike at the shop, I got a call from a bunny friend who was fostering a sick rabbit for a southern Indiana shelter. The rabbit has some lameness in one leg, drains in the other leg, sore hocks, and who knows what all, requiring an easy-entry special kind of litterbox I happened to have and not need. So, I took the litterbox to my friend, and picked up some hay and a dog crate while I was there.

My friend lives near a health food store that carries a few weird items I can’t find elsewhere, so to make the trip to the NW side even more efficient, I decided to go there. I’ve been to Georgetown Market at least ten times but for some reason I couldn’t find it today. My travels spiraled downward from there so I drew you a helpful map.

Red line: I traveled west/north to my friend’s house, where you see the red bunny. Note the attempted accuracy at using the correct exit ramps in my travel line.

Pink line: I try to drive from the bunny to the market, represented by a Quorn Turk’y Roast, which I bought for my Thanksgiving dinner. Remind me to tell you later about the turkey I adopted. Anyway, the Jeep now has hay in it, so I used Google images to find a representative picture by searching “jeep hay.” I got a picture of Hilary and Haylie Duff and their floofy dog doing some contest that Jeep sponsored, so that’s why you see them on I-65.

While I was unsure of how to find Georgetown Market from this direction, it is helpfully named after THE ROAD IT’S ON, so I turn left on Georgetown Road. I had a sense this was the wrong direction but to the right is a mall and no more road, so left it was. You will then see where I turned around at a liquor store because I could tell this was NOT the right way. I even checked my map at the liquor store but it also showed Georgetown ending at the mall. The map only cares about the part that goes to the Motor Speedway, I guess (note blue arrow pointing to the IMS, next to Danica Patrick making the sport respectable for other female drivers).

Light blue line: Now I’m heading back north (sorry that I’ve obscured the map’s “Georgetown Road” label with my pink and blue lines, but trust me, it’s the right road), and I decide to turn left on Lafayette, where you see the pink/blue/brown lines cross. I realize right about this time that there is a yummy Indian restaurant straight ahead (noted by the samosa) and it’s lunchtime, but I’m in the wrong lane. Surely I can stop back later, right?

The light blue line now stops at Rick James, because I notice there is an AT&T wireless store next to the market (yes, I’ve found it! Georgetown Road picks up again up here) and my cell battery likes to die after about ten minutes of conversation. I tell myself I’ll just price check here since cell stores tend to be a ripoff, and I chat with David on the dying phone about my plan. He says, “I hate cellular stores.” After signing a list in the store and after all the people ahead of me on the list have been helped, a salesperson gets to me.
Me: I need a battery for an LG CU500.
Her: We don’t carry those phones.
Me: I bought it from you.
Her: We haven’t had those in at least two years.
Note I haven’t had my phone nearly that long, but I do get a nice tip about a Batteries Plus store. I desperately ask for directions given my earlier problem finding the market, and find out it’s on Lafayette near WalMart, which I know is nearby, but she couldn’t tell me where to turn out of the store, so I will have to wing it. Then I call David and say, “Now I hate them too.”
(Regarding Rick James: That came up when I Googled for “AT&T b*tch”)

I walk next door to Georgetown Market where I buy things like organic carrots with the tops (the bunnies and piggies love those), no-beef-beef-bouillon, the aforementioned Turk’y Roast, rice noodles, etc. They don’t have harissa, which is in a recipe my magazine swears is easy to find at places like this. I’m still not quite sure what harissa is but it will probably involve a trip to the International Market, shown by the pretty bird. I put that in my head for another day because finding anything at the International Market requires a tour guide who speaks seven languages. I at least need to know what part of the world harissa comes from, and while I thought it might be Egyptian, this was not the day to get lost over there. Besides, I know there’s an Egyptian market nearby too! (See the camel.)

While at Georgetown Market I also have curried roasted vegetables from their hot bar, and it’s so good I’m going to find a recipe for it. It would be great with the turk’y!

Green line: Now I’m on a mission to find Batteries Plus. Watch the green line where I turn completely the wrong way, north, and end up on 56th Street, then come back down Lafayette. I see WalMart and figure the battery place might be in the outlot shops, but after driving around (see the circle around the second Hillary’s head), I discover it’s not here.

Now heading back down Lafayette, there it is! Except it’s not accessible due to a median. So I turn at the next possible spot, which is, oh, right in front of Georgetown Market at a furniture rental/clearance place. See the office chair made from a B-52 ejector seat. I decide to stop in and look for a used office chair, and the only ones that meet my ergonomic needs are used $600 Herman Miller chairs. Chairless, I get back in the car.

Blue line (not the Danica one): I finally get to Batteries Plus, where I pay $37 for an off-brand battery.

Brown line: Thanks to the median again, I have to turn around somewhere weird where I see a Mike-n-Ike car. Note WalMart in the background. I guess Hillary’s head is obscured by that utility pole.

In the interest of map accuracy, WalMart Hillary and the giant battery are actually on the east side of that street, but I ran out of room on my map where the ejector seat is. You probably shouldn’t get directions from me anyway.

I follow the brown line home, where I find an off-brand cell battery at for less than $9 with shipping. Along the way I call my mom to complain about her generation’s music because “Yummy yummy yummy I’ve got love in my tummy” comes on the radio, but she doesn’t answer.

Lessons learned: If I had an iPhone, I could have looked up Google Maps in the car and saved all that time and fuel. Better urban planning would have helped too. Heck, with an iPhone I wouldn’t need to go to the cell store because I could look online for the prices, get the phone number for Batteries Plus, find out what harissa is, etc. Meanwhile this entry took so long my wireless mouse’s batteries died in the middle.

I did get an hour of painting in before dark!

2 thoughts on “Now I hate them too

  1. This is hilarious! If I knew your city at all, you could have called me. I can give you explicit directions to places I have only visited once.

    Like the pictures denoting the destinations-very funny!

Leave a Reply